By Alex Mingoni & Danielle Dunn For Mental Health Awareness Week
Brace yourselves, dearest readers, this is a long story, but I assure you it does have a purpose, a purpose I’d like to think is bigger than us – so I do hope you’ll carry on reading.
One of the things I enjoy the most about my work as the co-founder of Not for Vanity is the human connections we’ve made along the way (22 months and counting).
On a gloomy January day this year, author Danielle Dunn reached out to us, like many self-published writers do, to enquire about the possibility to have her book ‘What It’s Like to Keep Living’ reviewed. I was immediately captivated by how Danielle presented her work and how she knew it would not necessarily be a book everyone could read. The reason was very simple and lay in the topics she’d decided to tackle: bullying (the relentless, senseless type), sexual assault, trauma and bereavement and the plethora of mental health challenges they carry with them. Here’s a snapshot of her story…
The first day of college signifies a new beginning for Althea. She does like fresh starts. The last couple of years haven’t been the easiest, having to deal with distant parents barely talking to each other and the very painful loss of her grandfather, who passed away in the worst of circumstances. But wounds, even the deepest ones, do mend, eventually, or so she hopes. The first person Althea meets is Will, a solitary young man who was also dealt a bad hand in life, having to live by himself and earn a living while looking after his seriously ill mother. It will take Althea and Will a long time to really connect and understand how much they mean to each other, initially separated by a wall of shyness, unhappiness, and fear to hurt each other rather than healing together. While Will is ‘one that doesn’t really fit in’ and he’s fundamentally fine with it, Althea tries to make friends, fighting her instinct to hide and that voice inside saying her classmates Sam and Emma and their entourage are bad news. Having to deal with these vicious, despicable monsters who won’t leave her alone as well as her own demons won’t be easy, with setbacks round every corner, but…
“Life is confusing. It’s hard and it’s easy. It’s fast and it’s slow. It’s time, and yet, it’s no time at all. It may be the hardest thing I ever had to go through. But I promise you that it was worth it. In the end, the only person who could save me was me.
Before I knew it my last day of college ever had arrived. Everything I had dreamt of over the past few months. I stood looking at the front once again. That front was where an important chapter of my life had begun. My fresh start.
The trees now held buds, flowers and leaves starting to peep out at the world. The grass was green and healthy once more. The sky was a painting filled with warm colours: pinks, peaches and oranges, with only a few clouds circling. Warm air followed me wherever I walked. Is this Hell? Is this Heaven? I often used to ask myself those two very important questions. I finally had my answer. No. I thought.
This is what it’s like to keep living”.
The ability with which Danielle managed to bring her main characters to life, making them jump out of the page – to the point that it almost felt like she was embodying them while writing – is impressive. The choice of a dual point of view was also a winning one in my humble opinion, making the reading more dynamic.
While not exceedingly graphic, the ‘toughest’ scenes especially are very well written and poignant, creating a rollercoaster of emotions that elicited feelings and thoughts I didn’t even know were in me.
The thing I probably appreciated the most is Danielle’s courage and determination in telling the story of young people struggling with social anxiety, having also to deal with things that are bigger than them and should not really have to deal with at their age.
I’ve said that before, but ‘What It’s Like to Keep Living’ is not an easy read. It surely wasn’t for me, having been a victim of bullying in my teens, forced to face people my age belittling me and openly insulting me for no real reason, while taking advantage of the fact that I was a good student, so they’d force me to help them with homework and other things. When I was growing up back in the 1990s there was no word for it, so I couldn’t understand. Thankfully, this is not the case today.
After reading the book, something urged me to reach out to author Danielle Dunn once again to hear her side of the story… that’s how the mini interview below was born.
Can you tell our readers why you chose to tackle these topics?
I have struggled with my own mental health in the past, and also work in mental health. Offering a more personal perspective has always been important to me. When I was struggling, I felt alone and like no one could possibly understand what I was feeling and how I was thinking. This story will forever be extremely important to me, because even if it helps one person to feel heard, or understood, or less alone, then writing it was worth it.
What’s the message you’d like people to take away from your book?
It would be nice for people who have not struggled with their mental health to understand a little. To be able to be there for the people they care about if they’re struggling. To maybe look out for signs or to be able to think about what might be helpful in those situations. Most importantly, I want people to start a conversation. Mental health is talked about more now than it ever has before, it’s more understood than before, but we can still do better.
Tell us a little about yourself…
This is a loaded question. I have loved writing since I was 6 years old and I wrote my own version of Sleeping Beauty. Writing has always been my biggest coping strategy when things get tough. I tend to write poems when I am struggling rather than work on stories though. I have an undergraduate degree in psychology and a masters degree in forensic psychology. I have a partner of 9 years and we’re actually getting married soon, and we have 2 dogs. Both are complete nut jobs. I love my family and my friends and I feel exceptionally lucky to be a part of their lives. And the last thing I guess, is that this book was my baby, I worked on it for a long time. Is it perfect? No. But I will forever be proud of this book and what it represents.
What are your future plans in terms of writing?
I started a new book, what feels like a long time ago now. I haven’t had much time to work on it recently. However, I do hope to work on it in the future, as I think there are still some very important stories to be told.
In honour of Mental Health Awareness Week 2024 (13-19 May), Danielle Dunn’s ‘What It’s Like To Keep Living’ is available for free on Amazon until Friday, 17th May: https://amzn.to/4dzmqSO
Editor’s Note From Alex
During our conversations Danielle and I shared meaningful insight on the challenges we faced growing up and as adults. We both strongly believe that, while mental health is a hot topic and top priority in the eyes of public opinion these days, a lot more can be done to ensure young people especially do not have to face the hurdles we have.
For this reason, I decided to share links to three UK charities very close to my heart, in the hope they might help if you too feel overwhelmed.
Mind UK | A charity fighting mental health, ‘for support for respect, for you’. Mind operates in England and Wales, supporting minds and making mental health an everyday priority. It offers help through information, advice and local services and brings together a network of individuals and communities – people who care about mental health to make a difference.
Mosaic LGBT + Young Person Trust | A charity aiming to support, educate and inspire young LGBT+ persons and those around them by providing accessible activities, programmes and services (including counselling) to empower community members, provide essential resources, advocate for young LGBT+ rights, and embrace, promote and endorse the diversity of young persons.
https://www.mosaictrust.org.uk
Anxiety UK (endorsed by The Prince’s Trust) | A national charity helping to support people living with anxiety, stress and anxiety-based depression. The charity was originally founded in Manchester in 1970 by Katharine and Harold Fisher as a direct result of Katharine’s personal experience of agoraphobia and with the sole aim of getting support in place for others living with anxiety. Today, they are helping people struggling with anxiety, stress, anxiety-based depression or a phobia all over the country.
Mental Health Awareness Week 2024 runs from Monday, 13th May to Sunday, 19th May. With this year’s theme ‘Movement: Moving more for our mental health’, the UK Mental Health Foundation wants to help people find moments for movement in their daily routines, as it is proven to have a positive impact on mood and overall wellbeing. For more information, visit https://www.mentalhealth.org.uk.